Brit Hume goes full Dick-in-a-Box over Chris Christie

There I am, watching Fox News last Sunday when Brit Hume goes and says something incredibly idiotic… okay, that’s a lie. I can’t even type it with a straight face… No, like the rest of America’s rational thinkers I don’t watch Fox News. So I actually heard about the idiotic thing Brit Hume said on Fox News, then watched it later on YouTube. What did Hume say? Well, during a discussion about “bridgegate” and New Jersey Governor Chris Christie’s history of bullying, Hume decided to go full on Dick-in-a-Box by claiming that Governor Christie is not a bully, but rather an “old-fashioned masculine, muscular guy” who fell victim to today’s “feminized atmosphere.” Here’s the video evidence, in case you missed it:

Hume’s comments stood out to me not because he said something shockingly stupid… the man works for Fox News, “say something shockingly stupid” must be part of the standard contract over there… but rather because of what his comments say about Hume’s (and I would argue many people’s) view of what “old-fashioned” or traditional masculinity entails. On a side note, It sounded like both the host, Howard Kurtz and contributor Lauren Ashburn were a bit taken aback by Hume’s comment, yet they chose not to challenge him. Perhaps they feared Hume’s manly retribution?

For a bit more context, let’s look back at the discussion occurring just before Hume’s comments. Before Fox News host Howard Kurtz asked Hume to discuss the “bully narrative” surrounding Governor Christie, Kurtz lists a few examples of Christie’s alleged bullying behavior. After mentioning a couple of things, he shows an example caught on camera that Kurtz calls one of Christie’s “greatest hits” (start at the :49 second mark to see the full lead in):

So let me get this straight… Brit Hume watches video of a Governor shouting at and insulting an audience member (a former Navy SEAL at that, who’s already being escorted out of the venue by police) and sees an example of positive, “good ‘ol fashion” manliness? This is on top of knowing that Christie may have been responsible for a retaliatory traffic jam that prevented hundreds of kids from getting to school on time and even worse, may have contributed to the death of a woman… Really Hume? Really?

It’d be one thing if Hume argued that Governor Christie isn’t a bully because he’s just doing what politicians do (still a BS argument if you ask me), but don’t piss on our legs and call it rain… or in this case justify a man’s abuses of power and call it masculinity. Plus, Hume’s “feminized environment” statement begs a lot of questions. What in this particular situation serves as a sign we’re living in a more “feminized environment?” Best I can gather, he’s implying that modern society is feminized because we (sometimes) believe that those with less power than a Governor shouldn’t be treated like shit? Or that people (including other politicians) should be able to do their jobs without worrying about some egomaniac with a hard-on for power wanting to make a point? That’s a pretty serious slippery slope of fucked-up and abusive behavior you’re sliding down there Hume… all in the name of your backwards masculine ideals.

In honor of Brit Hume and the many other talking (dick)heads like him, I’m using this as an opportunity to unveil my new rating system for Dick-in-a-Box like behavior, or Dick-in-a-Boxiness as I like to call it. So, Mr. Hume; for using the nonsensical term “feminized environment” and for believing that abuses of power meant to show “manliness” are justifiable and ultimately more important than children getting to school on time or, you know, a person’s LIFE, I’m going to rate this outburst’s level of Dick-in-a-Boxiness a 3.5 out of 5. I hope you’re proud of yourself.

Dick-in-a-Box Level 3.5

DICK-IN-A-BOXINESS RATING: 3.5

{ 2 comments }

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  • MOM January 22, 2014, 3:41 PM

    Frankly I’d give Brit a higher dick rating like 4. Then there was that much overused word again in the text of the article. You know the one I’m referring to.
    Love ya!

    Reply
    • Duane de Four January 27, 2014, 11:25 AM

      Thanks mom, as always, for your support… I debated giving Brit Hume a 4, but in the end I decided to reserve 4+ ratings for those who do even worse things (like acts of violence). I’m pretty sure I’ll have lots of opportunities to use that rating, sadly.

      Reply
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